Wednesday, July 25, 2007

grace and more grace

I just finished reading Grace Based Parenting...again. My inner-parenting-self so resonates with the heart of this book but so many times my parenting does not reflect grace. Here's a few notes, which I may have blogged in the past but obviously I needed another reminder.

Humanity's (thus, children's) 3 driving inner needs:
1. A need for security
2. A need for significance
3. A need for strength

Grace doesn't fit well with stricter models of parenting. Grace often contradicts parenting plans that want to distill roles down into checklists. Grace-based parenting is a heart-activated plan that takes its cues from a daily walk with Jesus Christ. Because of this, grace and strict parenting textbooks will never find themselves in agreement.

Grace based families are homes where children are given:
1. The freedom to be different
2. The freedom to be vulnerable
3. The freedom to be candid
4. The freedom to make mistakes

Grace helps you find the balance point in a world of extremes and keeps you from investing your energies in a long list of things that don't matter.

Legalistic parents maintain a relationship with God through obedience to a standard. The goal of all this when it comes to their children is to keep sin from getting into their home....When these children do sin, they are punished more for allowing the sin to happen than they are for the fact that it happened.

Grace-based homes are not homes without sin or regrets. They are just homes where, no matter what, you can't be written off.


Cindy said...

I need to read that book again myself! Thanks for inspiring me to pick it up again.

ConservaChick said...

YES! Getting caught up in the things that don't matter, a great way to make your kids rebel... His books are AWESOME! ~Karlie

Roses Are Red, Violets are Violet said...

ooohhh...good stuff. I love the last line..." no matter what, you can't be written off."

I hadn't heard of this book...definitely one I'd like to check out.